In the Spotlight
by Heavenly Pearl
Summary: Aino Minako has always dreamed of becoming an idol, but will her disapproving mother stand in the way of superstardom?


In the Spotlight

Ever since before I can remember, I've wanted to be a star. Not just any star, but the biggest star Japan -- no the world -- had ever seen. To see my name up in lights as millions of my adoring fans screamed their love for me…

That was my greatest wish.

So the day I learned about the auditions for a small, but pivotal part in Endo Miyaki's first movie musical, I literally had to pinch myself in the arm to prove to myself I was actually awake and it wasn't some wonderful dream that would fade away when morning came.

"Wow, a movie musical with Endo Miyaki…" I breathed, staring at the flyer posted outside of the Crown Arcade with watery eyes.

Beside me, my best friend, Hikaru, was equally enraptured with the image of our favorite pop idol in another one of her famous crazy outfits advertising the auditions. "Sugoi!" she exclaimed, clapping her hands together. "Imagine working on a movie with none other than the wonderful Miyaki-chan…"

"It would be a dream come true!" I declared.

"Hey, do you think she'll be there, Minako-chan? At the auditions?"

"Endo Miyaki? Sure, of course she'll be there," I declared confidently, considering myself an expert in all things related to show business. "The movie people will want to make sure she likes the girl they pick to play her little sister."

"You should try out for the part," Hikaru suggested, excitedly grabbing my arm.

"Me? Audition for a movie?"

"Yeah! And I'll go with you as your groupie!"

I frowned. "You don't want to audition with me, Hikaru-chan?"

The dark-haired girl shook her head. "I'm nowhere good enough to try out for a movie," she confessed mournfully, though her sadness only lasted for a moment. Grabbing my hands, Hikaru perked right back up. "But you are, Minako-chan! You can make our dreams come true for the both of us. You'll get the part for sure, and then we can spend the entire summer break with Endo Miyaki on a real-life movie set! Just imagine how jealous the other girls in our class would be if that happened!"

I had to admit, I was _very_ tempted to audition for the movie. After all, who knew when another opportunity like this would come along? It could be a once in a lifetime event.

But there was one person standing in my way to superstardom, and her name was Aino Chiyo.

My mother.

Okaa-san, or the Dragon Lady, as I sometimes referred to her when I knew she was no where in earshot, did not exactly share in my dream to become an idol. She felt I was wasting my time in wanting to pursue a career in the entertainment industry. If it were up to her, I would either become a boring housewife like her or go to college and have a career in a so-called "safe" profession, like teaching or accounting.

Needless to say, I thought either scenario was a fate worse than death.

"Forget about it, Hikaru-chan," I sighed, finally managing to tear my eyes away from the flyer. "Okaa-san will never allow me to go to the auditions. You know that as well as I do."

Hikaru's face immediately fell, unable to hide her disappointment. "Oh, I forgot…" she murmured. "Sorry, Minako-chan."

"It's okay. It was a nice fantasy while it lasted."

Just then, the door to the Crown Arcade slid open and a sandy-haired, fresh-faced boy, probably no more than fourteen or fifteen years old, stepped outside, wearing his ever-present apron and holding a broom in his hand. He was the son of the man who owned the arcade, as well as the nearby Crown Fruit Parlor, and worked part-time there after school.

"Hey, girls," he greeted us with a friendly smile. "Did you come to play some games? Tou-san just had a new crane machine installed, and it has some really cool prizes."

"Actually, me and Minako-chan were just looking at this flyer," Hikaru answered for us, pointing it out to him while I continued to sulk.

"Oh, yeah, the Endo Miyaki movie auditions. I put that up this morning," the boy said, whistling as he gave Miyaki an appreciative glance. "You know, it's really too bad they're only looking for young girls. I definitely would have been interested in auditioning for the role of her love interest."

"You know how to sing and dance, onii-san?" I asked, surprised when I heard that. He didn't exactly seem like a song-and-dance man to me.

Blushing, the older boy scratched the back of his neck and laughed. "Me? Sing and dance? Not really," he confessed. "When it comes to dancing, I have two left feet, and the only thing I ever sing is bad karaoke. But it would have been worth the embarrassment to get the chance to meet Miyaki-chan. What about you two? Are you going to the auditions?"

Hikaru shook her head. "Minako-chan wants to try out, but she's afraid her mother won't let her go to the auditions."

"That's too bad. I think you'd be perfect for the part."

"Really?" I asked.

"Sure, why not? I don't know how good you are at singing and dancing, but you've definitely got the looks. It's scary how similar you two look. You could be Miyaki-chan's long-lost little sister."

I felt my cheeks turn pink as I once again studied the flyer, embarrassed by the comparison to the beautiful idol, but now that he had mentioned it, I realized I did look a lot like Endo Miyaki. We both had the same baby blue eyes and long, pale blonde hair, and I had even taken to wearing my hair pulled back with a large bow just like she did. Even if I couldn't pass for Miyaki's little sister, I could easily be her cousin.

"If only okaa-san would let me go to the audition…" I said, unaware I had spoken the thought aloud until the arcade worker touched my arm.

"Hey, have you even asked your mother if you could try out yet?" he asked. "Who knows? She might say yes if you tell her how much you really want to audition for the movie."

"Do you think so, onii-san?"

He shrugged. "It's worth a shot, isn't it? What's the harm in asking? The worst she can do is say 'no', right?"

I knew for a fact okaa-san would say "no," but he was right. I had to at least try to convince my mother to let me go to the auditions. If I didn't, I would never forgive myself. This was my chance to be a star, and I wasn't about to give up without a fight.

"All right, I'm going to do it," I declared, pounding my fist in the palm of my other hand. "Watch out, world, because this is Aino Minako's time to shine!"

* * *

"No."

"But, okaa-san…"

As expected, convincing my mother to let me go to the movie auditions was an uphill battle. She didn't even let me finish explaining what the try-outs were for before answering me with a flat "no".

"Minako-chan, we talked about this before," she reminded me, wagging the spoon she was using to stir the soup for tonight's dinner in my direction. "You're much too young to be auditioning for some movie. What about school?"

"They're filming it during summer break so I wouldn't have to miss any of my classes if I got the part," I explained.

"Still, what about your summer homework?"

"I promise I'll work on it everyday. Just imagine how much I would have to write about in my summer journal if I starred in a movie. I'd have the best journal in the class for sure."

"No."

"Please, okaa-san," I begged, literally getting on my hands and knees. "If you don't let me go to this audition, I'll die!"

"Honestly, Minako-chan!" she scolded, yanking the hem of her skirt from my hands. "Don't be so melodramatic. Nobody ever died from audition-depravation."

"Well, maybe I won't physically die, but you'll be killing my dream. Is that what you want to do, okaa-san? Kill your only daughter's most precious dream to become a world-famous singer/actress?" I asked, looking up at her with the most pathetic expression I could muster.

Usually, it worked like a charm on my father, but okaa-san must have had a heart made of stone. Shaking her head, she simply turned back to stirring the soup with not an flicker of sympathy crossing her stern features.

"There will be other auditions," she pointed out. "You know your father and I both agreed that if you still wanted to pursue this crazy dream of yours, we would allow you to start auditioning only when you turn thirteen and not a day before. I think we're being more than fair in the matter."

"But that's four years away," I protested as I stood back up. Obviously, groveling was not going to work. "And this might be the only chance I have to work with Endo Miyaki."

"Endo Miyaki-san? Who's that?"

My mouth dropped in disbelief. Was I really this woman's daughter? How could she _not_ know about Endo Miyaki? After all the time I spent listening to her albums, watching her TV shows, and collecting her posters, I had hoped my mother had at least some idea of who Endo Miyaki was.

"Miyaki-chan is _only _my most favorite idol singer ever," I answered once I had gotten over my shock. "She's going to be the star of the movie."

"I thought your favorite idol was that Kusaka girl."

"Kusaka Miki-chan?" I rolled my eyes at the mention of the out-of-fashion idol I positively adored only a few months before. "Please, okaa-san. She is _so _three months ago. Nobody listens to her anymore."

"Well, excuse me for not keeping up-to-date with the ever-changing world of Japanese pop," she sighed. "Sometimes I wonder why you even want to be an idol. If you're lucky, maybe you'll be around for a year or two, but inevitably, the public will move onto someone younger and prettier and you'll be yesterday's news."

I had to admit there was some truth in my mother's words, but the lure of fame, no matter how fleeting it was, was still a strong one. Even if I did go the way of Kusaka Miki and the hundreds of idols that came before her, fading into obscurity and finding my albums sitting at the bottom of the half-price bin in the record store, somehow I knew those few precious moments would be enough to last a lifetime. Besides, everybody was entitled to their ten minutes in the spotlight, and as far as I was concerned, the auditions were my ticket to the big time.

"Please, okaa-san!" I begged one more time. "It's just one audition. I promise if you let me go this one time, I won't ask again until I'm thirteen. Just bend the rules this once!"

"Minako, the answer is no," my mother declared. "Now, go upstairs and wash for dinner. Your father should be home any minute."

"Fine," I said, pivoting on my heel.

Huffing, I stomped up the stairs to my room and slammed the door behind me, fuming. I couldn't believe how totally unfair she was being. Mothers were supposed to nurture their children's dreams, not strike them down.

"Stupid, old, meanie Dragon Lady," I muttered under my breath, crawling onto my bed after pushing off some of my plush toys. I knew I was supposed to be washing up for supper, but I had no intention of eating that night. In fact, maybe I would go on a hunger strike in protest of okaa-san's decision. It would serve her right to have me wither up and die.

And she said nobody ever died from audition-depravation…

Ha, I'd show her.

She'd be sorry when I came downstairs a few days from now, all skin and bones, looking like Buddha or Ghandi or whatever the heck that skinny guy's name was. Gogo? Gonzo? Goulash?

"Minako-chan, your father's home," my mother called up a few minutes later, her voice sickeningly sweet and chipper, reminding me of one of those perfect mothers on a 1950s black-and-white American sitcom. "Come eat your dinner."

Rolling my eyes, I simply laid there on my bed and stared at the ceiling.

"Minako-chan," she called again when I didn't come down, "you're soup is getting cold."

As if I cared.

"Aino Minako, if you don't get your butt down here right this minute, you can just go to bed hungry," she threatened, losing her usual cool and transforming into full Dragon Lady mode. "And don't think I'm joking around. This is your last chance. Come downstairs right now, or I'm giving this soup to that poor white tomcat that's always hanging around the house."

"Fine, go ahead and give it to him," I finally yelled back. "See if I care."

Downstairs, I could hear my mother let out a cross between a frustrated scream and an angry growl, and I smiled, immensely satisfied with myself. It served her right.

After that, okaa-san gave up trying to get me downstairs, leaving me alone for the rest of the evening. In celebration, I turned on my CD player and sighed, content to listen to Endo Miyaki's melodious voice as her newest single filled my bedroom.

I envied her. Miyaki's mother was probably totally cool, not a wicked witch like mine. Too bad we really weren't long-lost sisters. Then I could run away to her gorgeous Shinjuku mansion, and when Miyaki found out who I really was, she'd insist I take the role without an audition because who else would be better for the part than her own beautiful, equally talented little sister and all my dreams would come true…

A knock on the door abruptly ended my fantasy, and I frowned, reaching over to turn off the music. "Who is it?" I asked, sitting up on the bed and grabbing one of my school books in a pathetic attempt to pretend I had been working on my science homework.

"It's me, Minako-chan," my mother said. "I brought you a snack. May I come in?"

I was tempted to tell her no, but a loud grumbling in the pit of my stomach convinced me otherwise. So much for my hunger strike… Berating myself for being so weak, I sighed and went over to the door to let her in.

"I'm sorry I gave your soup to the cat," she apologized, entering my room and setting the tray she held in her hands on my desk. On it, she had brought me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without the crust, just how I liked it, and a cold glass of milk. "I shouldn't have done that."

"It's okay," I said, more than a little bit ashamed of myself as well. "I should have came downstairs when you told me to. I was just so mad about the movie auditions…"

"You really want to do this, don't you?" okaa-san asked, sitting down on my bed as I took a seat at my desk to eat.

I nodded. "More than anything in the entire world."

"Then…okay."

My eyes widened in disbelief as I set down the sandwich and swiveled around in my chair. "Okay? Does that mean…?"

"Yes, that means I will take you to the auditions," she announced. "Your father and I talked it over, and we agreed to let you try out this one time."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" I squealed, running over to give her a hug.

"Don't get too excited, Minako-chan," she warned once I pulled away. "Of course, we will still expect you to keep up with your homework and your chores, and if I hear of you getting in the slightest bit of trouble, you can forget about the entire thing…"

"Don't worry, okaa-san. I'll be on my best behavior. Promise!"

"Good." Standing up, my mother kissed me on the top of my head and headed to the door. "Now, finish up your snack and get back to work on your homework."

"Yes, ma'am!" I saluted, getting straight to work.

I was never more excited to do long division.

* * *

During the next two weeks leading up to the auditions, I became a singing, dancing, acting machine. Every precious spare moment was spent perfecting my audition song, and if it had been up to me, I would have gladly skipped school to practice as well if I hadn't feared the Dragon Lady would find out and thus forbid me from attending the auditions after all. I knew it was only by a miracle from God that she even agreed to let me go in the first place, so I was careful to be on my very best behavior, determined not to lose the chance to make my dream come true.

And I had no doubts that it would. Everybody I sang for -- Hikaru, the boy from the arcade, my father, kids from school -- said I was the best they had ever heard. In fact, the only person who didn't seem to like my act was the Dragon Lady, who only said it was "nice" and went right back to washing dishes. I was upset at first, but I soon got over it, realizing my mother couldn't possibly have any idea what she was talking about. She was just a fuddy-duddy housewife who took joy in crushing her only daughter's dreams and probably couldn't carry a tune if her life depended on it. What did she know?

As it turned out, she knew a lot more than I thought.

* * *

The day of the movie auditions had finally come. Arriving at the convention center that morning with my mother and Hikaru, who had insisted on coming along even though she wasn't trying out to lend me moral support, I could barely contain my excitement. I couldn't wait to get up on that stage and sing my heart out. All my hard work over the past couple of weeks was going to pay off, big time. I just knew it.

"I can't believe this is actually happening," I said as we entered the room where all the girls trying out for the part were supposed to sign up and get their numbers. Already, it was packed almost to capacity. "Isn't it exciting, Hikaru-chan?"

Hikaru nodded, her eyes wide with wonderment as she took everything in. "This is so cool, Minako-chan! I'm so happy for you! You're going to do great today."

"You know, you can still try out, too," I suggested. "It'll be fun!"

"No way," she said, blushing. "I don't even have a song prepared. I'm just here to cheer on my best friend in pursuit of her dream and maybe have a chance to meet Endo Miyaki-chan in the flesh. Where is she, anyway? Didn't you say she would be here? I don't see her anywhere."

Wondering that myself, I stood on my tiptoes and tried to see over the heads of the people in front of us. "I don't see her, either," I sighed, a little bit disappointed. I was hoping I could meet her before the auditions and have her autograph my hair ribbon for luck. "But maybe she'll show up later. You know how stars are always fashionably late…"

"Okay, enough chit-chat, girls," okaa-san said, interrupting our conversation and gently pushing us in the direction of the long line that had formed in front of sign-up table. "There will be plenty of time for that later after Minako-chan gets her audition number. With so many girls here to try out for the part, I have a feeling it will be quite awhile before she will be called to perform."

She was certainly right about that. There must have been at least two hundred girls there for the auditions, much more than I had expected. I didn't realize I would have to compete against so many people.

"Are you nervous, Minako-chan?" Hikaru asked me in a whisper as we headed backstage after I had finished signing up to wait for the auditions to start. "I know I am, and I'm not even competing. You're so brave to be doing this."

Pinning my number -- lucky 77, or so I hoped -- to my dress, I laughed. "Don't be silly, this is nothing," I said, more to convince myself than Hikaru. "It's not like we're going to be singing in front of some kind of huge audience. It's just the judges and families of the other girls. It'll be a piece of pie."

"It's 'cake', Minako-chan," my mother corrected me, pulling out a brush from her purse to put the finishing touches on my hair. "The saying is 'It'll be a piece of cake,' and I don't think you should be so nonchalant about performing. You might think you're fine now, but once you get on that stage, it's a whole different world out there."

"Hey, aren't you supposed to be the one telling me not to worry and that I'm going to do fine?" I wondered, faintly annoyed by my mother's lack of support. Just because she hadn't wanted me to audition didn't mean she had to put a damper on the whole thing.

"I'm only trying to warn you, honey. No matter how prepared you think you are, even the most talented people sometimes have to deal with stage fright at one time or another."

"How would you know?"

"You'd be surprised…"

Confused by okaa-san's cryptic words, I turned around to ask her what she meant, but before I could, one of the producers chose that moment to announce that anyone who was not auditioning needed to find their seats so they could begin. "I guess that means Hikaru-chan and I better go," okaa-san announced, putting away the brush. "We'll see you later, okay? Break a leg, Minako-chan."

"_Break _a leg?" I screeched. Just how bad did my mother want me to fail? "But if I do that, I won't be able to perform! You really don't want me to do this, do you, okaa-san?"

"It's just an expression," she said, a slightly amused smile on her lips. "That's how people in show business wish a person good luck."

"Oh." Embarrassed, I turned a bright red and laughed. "I knew that. Thanks. I'll see you later."

Okaa-san and Hikaru then left for their seats, leaving me backstage with the rest of the two hundred hopefuls trying out for the part. The anxious chattering that had filled the air only seconds before immediately silenced as we heard the curtain roll open and a woman's distinctive voice, instantly recognizable to all present, begin to speak, explaining how the auditions would be conducted. I only paid partial attention to the rules, though, caught up in the excitement of being in the same room as the one and only Endo Miyaki, who was even prettier in person than she was in her music videos.

I knew she would come! I knew it!

"And that is how this contest will be run," Miyaki finished, bowing politely toward the audience. "I wish all the girls here the best of luck, and I look forward to working with the winner this summer on the movie musical. Now, let's begin with entry number one!"

There was round of polite applause, and the first contestant, a rather plain-looking girl, took her spot on stage. Wanting a better look at my competitor, I moved to the wings, where a group of girls had already gathered, evidently having the same idea, and watched as she began to perform.

Despite her average looks, even I had to admit the plain Mary had talent. It was obvious that she had taken years of dance lessons, and her voice, while lacking any distinctive traits, was nevertheless good and on pitch while she sang Miyaki's first single. Hearing the audience's enthusiastic reception as she bowed, I began to feel the first signs of butterflies fluttering in my stomach, which only grew as the morning wore on.

I couldn't believe the level of talent I was up against. Of course, there were the occasional bombs, like number 32, who completely froze the moment the music started and didn't sing a single note, or number 57, who was so off-pitch, she ran off the stage in the middle of her song, sobbing, but for the most part, my competitors were all fantastic singers and dancers. Some of them, I realized with a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, I even recognized from commercials and TV shows.

Suddenly, the realization of my dream of working with Endo Miyaki and becoming a star didn't seem quite so certain.

What was I thinking? I couldn't do this! I must have been insane to even think I had a chance of winning the coveted role. I was a hack, a fake, a talentless nobody who should have listened to her mother when she said I would never become a star…

"Thank you, number 76! Well done," Miyaki said over thunderous applause, catching my attention as I realized in horror I would be called next. "Now, let's welcome our next contestant, number 77!"

Gulping as I heard my number being called, I took the microphone I had been handed, slowly made my way on stage, and took my place on the large red "X" marked on the floor. A bright spotlight shone down on me, nearly blinding me at first, and I felt my throat run dry as I stood waiting for my music to begin, trying desperately to remember the first verse to my song. Was it "Dame! Dame! Dame tte iwarete" or "Itta! Itta! Zettai daijoubu!"?

Oh, kami-sama, I couldn't remember!

I felt as if I was about to throw up, the butterflies in my stomach not so much fluttering anymore, but flapping gale force winds, but as soon as I heard the intro to my song coming from the speakers, I started to relax. The words were coming back to me, and, bringing the microphone up to my mouth, I began to sing, determined to give it my all. I _would_ prove the Dragon Lady wrong.

As I held onto the final note, the audience began to burst into thunderous applause. It was more wonderful than I ever dared to imagine! If I could have, I would have stayed on that red X forever, but after taking my final bow, I shot the audience my trademark V-for-victory sign and headed back to the wings, knowing that if I had done as well as I thought I did, it wouldn't be my last.

Relieved to be done with my audition, I was on Cloud 7 for the rest of the morning as I watched the rest of the girls with disinterest, no longer worrying about the other competitors. That was the best I had ever performed, and, although I couldn't be certain, it seemed as if I had received the loudest applause of the day. If I didn't win the part, the judges were either blind or deaf or both. As far as I was concerned, the competition was over.

Of course, technically, the audition wasn't over, and it took a solid three more hours before the final contestant took her bow and the judges, along with Miyaki, left to make their decision. Backstage, an aura of nervous excitement filled the air as we waited to hear the results.

"Minako-chan!" Hikaru exclaimed, she and my mother managing to find me among the mob, which was growing heavier by the minute as the girls' family and friends came to congratulate them. "You were wonderful!" she said, hugging me so tightly I could barely breathe. "You're going to win for sure!"

"You really think so, Hikaru-chan?"

"Absolutely."

"Hikaru-chan, I don't think you should be making claims like that," my mother remarked, frowning. "Don't get Minako-chan's hopes up. We have no idea what the judges will do. There were a lot of talented girls who tried out today. It's not going to be an easy decision."

"But Minako-chan was the best, Aino-san," Hikaru protested, proving once again why she was my best friend. I couldn't believe that even after the fantastic job I had done on stage, okaa-san still was acting as if I was chasing a dream that would never come true.

"We'll see," was all okaa-san could say before the producer once again told the audience to find their seats and for all the girls to line up on stage in numerical order. The judges were back from their meeting, and as I took my spot near the end of row four, I saw Endo Miyaki in the wings with a large white envelope in her hand.

_Please let it be me,_ I silently prayed as I noticed the envelope, which undoubtedly held the results of the auditions. _Please, please, please!_

"And now is the moment you've all been waiting for," the producer announced once all the girls had found their places. "Miyaki-chan, will you do the honors?"

Walking across the stage, the idol bowed politely toward the audience before slowly opening the envelope and pulling out the card. There was a collective gasp as everyone, including me, drew in a deep breath.

This was it! In just a few moments, all my dreams…

"And the winner of the part of Watanabe Ai in _Heart of Gold_ is… Entry #124! Congratulations, Hiwatari Shizuka-chan!"

…wouldn't come true.

* * *

The moment we were released from the stage, I ran out of the auditorium, my vision blurred with tears. I didn't know where I was going, but I didn't care, only knowing I had to get away from the place where my dreams had died. If I saw another stage in my lifetime, it would be too soon.

It just wasn't fair, I thought, aimlessly walking around the building. The judges were supposed to have picked me, not her. What did Hiwatari Shizuka have that I didn't? I vaguely remembered her performance, and she was good, but surely not better than me. Or was she? I didn't even know anymore. I thought I was great during my audition, but maybe I didn't do as well as I imagined. Was it possible that I had been so excited to be on stage, I fooled myself into believing I was better than I actually was?

As it turned out, I ended up outside the convention center, sitting on the edge of an outdoor heart-shaped fountain gilded with gold. It was as good a place as any, so there I sat sobbing, ignoring the curious stares of passersby, until my mother showed up a couple of minutes later without Hikaru, looking none too happy with my behavior.

"You see, Minako, this is why I didn't want you to audition for the movie," okaa-san scolded, hands on her hips. "I knew you would be disappointed if you failed to win the part."

"Then why did you let me try out?" I asked bitterly, looking up at her. "You're my mother. You should have protected me from making a fool of myself out there."

Sighing, okaa-san sat down beside me. "Because I thought it would help you learn a lesson," she answered.

"A lesson?" I repeated, looking back down again and kicking the back of my shoes against the fountain. "Well, I certainly did learn something today. I learned that I'm a no-talent failure who will never become a star."

"That's not true," okaa-san said. "I thought you were great up there on stage today."

I glanced up again, eyes opened wide in shock. "Really?" That was the first time I ever remembered okaa-san complimenting me on anything remotely related to my dream of becoming an idol.

My mother nodded, affectionately straightening the large pink bow I wore on the back of my head. "I was really proud of you, Minako-chan. You tried your best, and you did a wonderful job."

"Oh, you're just saying that because you're my mother," I mumbled, the momentary joy I felt from her praise crashing back down. "You have to say stuff like that. It's in the _Mother's Handbook_."

"No, I'm not," she insisted. "Yes, some of the girls who tried out were better than you, but you did well considering it was your first audition and you have no professional training. Those other girls were probably all seasoned pros. In fact, before the auditions, I heard a couple of mothers talking about their daughters' agents. This wasn't some amateur competition. This was the real thing."

"But I still wasn't good enough to beat them, okaa-san. They were all so pretty and talented. I'll never be as good as they are."

"You won't if you keep thinking like that. Nobody ever wins their first audition, Minako-chan. I'm sure now that you know what to expect, you'll be better prepared for the next one."

Another audition? I shook my head. No way! There was no way I was going to put myself through that kind of heartbreak and embarrassment ever again.

"There won't be another audition, okaa-san," I declared. "I'm officially giving up on my dream to become an idol. I'll just go to college and become a teacher like you always wanted me to do. It's not my dream job, but maybe if I'm lucky, I can put on plays for the school's annual culture festival or something like that."

"You don't really mean that, do you, Minako-chan?" okaa-san asked softly. "Becoming an idol was your dream. You shouldn't give up so easily if it is something you really want to do."

Confused, I glanced over at my mother, surprised to see there was sadness in her dark blue eyes. "But you always said my dream was stupid," I reminded her, furrowing my brow. "I thought you would be happy that I finally decided to give it up."

"Not if it means you'll be unhappy. I don't want you to make the same mistake I made…"

Realizing what she had said, okaa-san moved to immediately cover her mouth with her hand, but the damage was already done. I stared at her, wondering what kind of mistake she could have possibly made in her past.

"Mistake?"

"Well, I suppose there's no reason why I should keep it a secret any more," she sighed. "The truth is, when I was a little bit older than you are now, I wanted to be an idol singer too."

"You wanted to be an idol?" I asked in disbelief. Somehow, I could not imagine my prim and proper mother having such a wild dream.

Okaa-san laughed. "Surprised, aren't you? I remember I wanted to be just like Yuuki Suzumi-chan."

"Who?" I asked, never hearing of such a person.

"She was a popular idol back in the seventies. She didn't last for very long, but at the time, I thought she was the most beautiful and talented girl in the world."

"Oh, I see. Yuuki-san was kinda like your Endo Miyaki."

"Exactly."

"So, what happened?" I asked, curious in the story despite myself. "Why didn't you try to achieve your dream?"

My mother was quiet for a long moment as she considered the question, her hand splashing the surface of the fountain's pool of water and causing gentle ripples. She appeared lost in thought, and I wondered what she was thinking about with such a melancholy expression on her face.

"Actually, I did try…once," she finally admitted, pulling her hand out of the water and drying it on her skirt. "Around that time, a record company was holding this talent show in search of the next Yuuki Suzumi, and I decided to try out."

"I guess it didn't go very well, huh?"

She chuckled at the memory, shaking her head. "Not at all. I was so unbelievably nervous up on that stage that I forgot most of the words to my song, and the parts I did remember were so off-pitch, one of the judges said I could have woken the dead."

"That wasn't very nice of him to say."

"Well, that's show business, honey," okaa-san said, the voice of experience coloring her words. "The producers didn't care if they shattered hundreds of teenaged girls' dreams on their quest to find the next superstar."

"Is that what happened to you?" I wondered aloud. "Did they shatter your dream to become an idol?"

My mother nodded. "After the show, I couldn't bear the thought of putting myself through yet another humiliation like that one. I simply gave up on my dream and never looked back."

"That's so sad…"

Hearing the story of what had happened to okaa-san, I was beginning to see my mother in a different light. No wonder she hadn't wanted me to pursue a career in show business. It wasn't that she was trying to be mean; she was only trying to protect me from disappointment. It made me want to cry, thinking of all the mean and horrid things I had said to her, thinking she was nothing more than the Dragon Lady, out to crush all my hopes and dreams. If I had only known…

"Don't feel too sorry for me, Minako-chan," she said, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and pulling me close. "I sometimes wonder what might have happened if I had continue to pursue a career in music, but I don't necessarily regret quitting. After all, I ended up having a wonderful life -- a nice house, a good husband, and a beautiful, talented daughter I love more than anything in this world."

"Do you really mean that, okaa-san?" I asked, lifting my head from her shoulder.

"Of course. And one day, that daughter is going to become a famous idol with millions of adoring fans all around the world."

"Thank you."

Wiping away my tears, I jumped up from my seat on the fountain, newly enthused and full of determination. Okaa-san might have had a bad experience when she was younger, but I could still make my dream come -- for both of us.

"Does that mean I can continue to go to auditions?"

"When you turn thirteen, yes."

"Okaa-san!"

"What? I still think you're too young. Have fun, be a kid for a while. You'll thank me later."

"Okay, I guess I can wait until then," I agreed, a little disappointed but happy that okaa-san had at last decided to support my dream. Besides, four years wasn't _that _long. It would give me plenty of time to perfect my craft. The next time I got on a stage, I was going to become a star.

And if I didn't…

Well, there was always next time.

DISCLAIMER: Sailor Moon is the property of Takeuchi Naoko.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: First of all, I want to point out all the phrase manglings during the course of this story were purely intentional. After all, it wouldn't be a true Minako story without them, so don't blame the author. Blame the narrator.

This story was based on information obtained from the Sailor Moon manga, but there were some aspects I borrowed from Codename: Sailor V as well, such as the inclusion of Hikaru, Minako's best friend, and the boy from the arcade. Yes, most people will probably recognize Minako's "onii-san" as none other than Furuhata Motoki of Sailor Moon fame, but he also appeared in the Sailor V manga as well. (Just a little random trivia.) Also, the white tomcat? You can believe whatever you want to believe, but I think there's a good chance it might have been Artemis, don't you?


End file.
